President Dallin H. Oaks on acquiring spirituality

President Dallin H. Oaks (born August 12, 1932) served as president of BYU from 1971-1980.  He was then appointed as a justice of the Utah Supreme Court, and resigned when he was called to the Quorum of Twelve Apostles in 1984. He became President of the Quorum of Twelve Apostles and also 1st Counselor in the First Presidency in January 2018.

"How do we achieve spirituality? How do we attain that degree of holiness where we can have the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost? How do we come to view and evaluate the things of this world with the perspective of eternity?

"We seek spirituality through faith, repentance, and baptism; through forgiveness of one another; through fasting and prayer; through righteous desires and pure thoughts and actions. We seek spirituality through service to our fellowmen; through worship; through feasting on the word of God, in the scriptures and the teachings of the living prophets. We attain spirituality through making and keeping covenants, through conscientiously trying to keep all the commandments of God. Spirituality is not acquired suddenly. It is the consequence of a succession of right choices. It is the harvest of a righteous life.

"Through the lens of spirituality, we see all the commandments of God as invitations to blessings. Obedience and sacrifice, loyalty and love, fidelity and family all appear in eternal perspective."

- Dallin H. Oaks, "Spirituality," General Conference October 1985
Click here to read or listen to the full talk

President Oaks shares some insight into what spirituality is as he introduces this topic; he mentions,

• it involves a state of holiness
• it includes the "constant companionship of the Holy Ghost"
• with it, we see the world around us "with the perspective of eternity"

As we seek to increase our own ability to do those things, we grow closer to God and feel His influence more and more in our lives. Specifically, we get closer by living the life of a disciple in our actions of obedience, service, and sacrifice, and through "conscientiously trying to keep all the commandments of God."

This "lens of spirituality" provides an especially interesting perspective, helping us to see commandments not as limiting and constraining (as some people claim), but as "invitations to blessings." I love that thought. God is only inviting us to do the things that will bring greater happiness, if only we learn to humbly and willingly follow Him!

(Compilation and commentary by David Kenison, Orem, Utah, 2018)

Elder Neal A. Maxwell on the eternal impact of mothers

Elder Neal A. Maxwell (1926-2004) served as a Seventy from 1976-1981, then as a member of the Quorum of Twelve until his death from cancer in 2004.

"When the real history of mankind is fully disclosed, will it feature the echoes of gunfire or the shaping sound of lullabies? The great armistices made by military men or the peacemaking of women in homes and in neighborhoods? Will what happened in cradles and kitchens prove to be more controlling than what happened in congresses? When the surf of the centuries has made the great pyramids so much sand, the everlasting family will still be standing, because it is a celestial institution, formed outside telestial time. The women of God know this.

"No wonder the men of God support and sustain you sisters in your unique roles, for the act of deserting home in order to shape society is like thoughtlessly removing crucial fingers from an imperiled dike in order to teach people to swim.

"We men love you for meeting inconsiderateness with consideration and selfishness with selflessness. We are touched by the eloquence of your example. We are deeply grateful for your enduring us as men when we are not at our best because—like God—you love us not only for what we are, but for what we have the power to become.

"We have special admiration for the unsung but unsullied single women among whom are some of the noblest daughters of God. These sisters know that God loves them, individually and distinctly. They make wise career choices even though they cannot now have the most choice career. Though in their second estate they do not have their first desire, they still overcome the world. These sisters who cannot now enrich the institution of their own marriage so often enrich other institutions in society. They do not withhold their blessings simply because some blessings are now withheld from them. Their trust in God is like that of the wives who are childless, but not by choice, but who in the justice of God will receive special blessings one day."

- Neal A. Maxwell, "The Women of God," General Conference April 1978
Click here to read or listen to the full talk

This is a beautiful, classic talk from Elder Maxwell, shared when he was a member of the Seventy. He shares an important perspective about what really, ultimately matters in this life; it is not the achievements of men and women in the world, but the quiet, powerful things that happen in home and family:

How grateful we should all be for the women who have given so much to contribute to the building of individual lives and character!

Elder Maxwell also acknowledges the faithful contribution of the women who don't have the privilege of serving currently as mothers, noting they "are some of the noblest daughters of God." I know many of those, and am grateful for their examples of faith and patience, trusting in God and in God's timing.

(Compilation and commentary by David Kenison, Orem, Utah, 2018)

President Russell M. Nelson on responsibilities and opportunities of motherhood

President Russell M. Nelson (born Sept 9, 1924) was an internationally-renowned heart surgeon when he was called to serve as a member of the Quorum of Twelve Apostles in 1984. He became president of that quorum on July 15, 2015. Following the death of President Monson, he was set apart as president of the Church on January 14, 2018.

"As Adam bore responsibilities of fatherhood, so Eve bore the responsibilities of motherhood. She did not shirk them. So with welcome arms you may gratefully greet those children God may send, through your divine design as cocreator. With your husband, be obedient to the commandment to multiply and replenish the earth, as your opportunity, your spiritual guidance, your wisdom, and your health allow. You will gain joy and rejoicing in your posterity. That enrichment becomes more beautiful and precious with each passing year.

"For you childless sisters and those without companions, remember the eternal timetable of the Lord is much longer than the lonely hours of your preparation or the total of this mortal life. These are only as microseconds when compared to eternity. Your willingness and worthiness are surely known to Him. The spiritual rewards of motherhood are available to all women. Nurturing the young, comforting the frightened, protecting the vulnerable, teaching and giving encouragement need not—and should not—be limited to our own children.

"Sisters, be patient. I know something of the pressures you feel. Your kitchens are too small. Your budgets are too tight. Demands upon you exceed your capacity to help all who cry out to you. Through it all, 'Improve the shining moments; Don’t let them pass you by' (Hymns, 1985, no. 226). Take time for spiritual regeneration....

"I’m glad Sister Nelson has not tried to be a 'supermom.' But she has been a 'soothing' mom. This she has done simply by being herself.

"When priorities are in place, one can more patiently tolerate unfinished business."

- Russell M. Nelson, "Lessons from Eve," General Conference October 1987
Click here to read or listen to the full talk

President Nelson has addressed the sacred roles of women and mothers on a number of occasions; this talk is worth reviewing for the five lessons he draws from the example of the first woman and mother on earth, largely from the description in Moses 5:

• She labored beside her companion
• She and Adam bore the responsibilities of parenthood
• She and her partner worshipped the Lord in prayer
• She and Adam heeded divine commandments of obedience and sacrifice
• She and her husband taught the gospel to their children

The excerpt quoted above is drawn from the second of those five points. President Nelson acknowledges the challenges that motherhood can present; but also recognizes the challenge faced by women who do not have the privilege of being mothers at the present time, helping share some eternal perspective on that aspect. He points out that "the spiritual rewards of motherhood are available to all women."

In discussing the challenges of coping with the many demands that come to mothers, President Nelson encouraged perspective and patience. Mothers can't do everything, and shouldn't try! They should, however, seek spiritual strength and keep a perspective on what matters most:

There are often things "left undone" in the midst of the demands of life. President Nelson reassures mothers in particular that they should not try to do everything. But as they seek for the most important part of their sacred role, they will be blessed and inspired to make those choices in ways that will truly make a difference in this life and in eternity.

(Compilation and commentary by David Kenison, Orem, Utah, 2018)

President David O. McKay on the profound influence of mothers

President David O. McKay (1873-1970) was called to the Quorum of Twelve Apostles in 1906.  He served as a counselor in the First Presidency to Heber J. Grant and George Albert Smith beginning in 1945, then then as the president of the Church from 1951 to his death in 1970 at age 96.

"Motherhood is the greatest potential influence either for good or ill in human life. The mother's image is the first that stamps itself on the unwritten page of the young child's mind. It is her caress that first awakens a sense of security; her kiss, the first realization of affection; her sympathy and tenderness, the first assurance that there is love in the world. True, there comes a time when Father takes his place as exemplar and hero of the growing boy; and in the latter's budding ambition to develop manly traits, he outwardly seems to turn from the more gentle and tender virtues engendered by his mother. Yet that ever-directing and restraining influence implanted during the first years of his childhood linger with him and permeate his thoughts and memory as distinctively as perfume clings to each particular flower."

- David O. McKay, Gospel Ideals, p. 452; True to the Faith, pp. 167–68

President McKay spoke on various occasions about this theme. He felt profoundly the blessing of a mother in his own life, and watched his beloved Emma care for their children. He had some of the best examples possible.

It's hard to quantify how important early impressions are on a child, and how deeply formative they must be. To have an image of kindness and gentleness "stamped" on the developing mind truly must make a difference:

President McKay suggests that in many cases, the father's influence is not felt as profoundly in the beginning but comes into play later. But yet the foundation set by a mother's love is something that influences the rest of life. How fortunate a child is to feel that sacred gift!

(Compilation and commentary by David Kenison, Orem, Utah, 2018)

President Gordon B. Hinckley on the divine potential of women

President Gordon B. Hinckley (1910-2008) was called to the Quorum of Twelve in 1961. He served as a counselor in the First Presidency from 1981-1995, then as Church President until his death in 2008.

"To you women, I wish to issue a challenge tonight. That challenge is to rise to the stature of the divine within you. As you have been reminded, yours is a godly inheritance. 'I am a child of God' is not an idle or meaningless statement....

"Is there anything more beautiful, anything that speaks more of divinity than a lovely little girl? I have little granddaughters, bright-eyed and beautiful, who sing and smile and touch my heart with thoughts of heaven....

"I see young women, radiant in the beauty of youth, whose virtue is more precious than rubies—young women who are bright and who study with enthusiasm and diligence to learn the word of the Lord and also to equip themselves to take their places with honor and ability in the world in which they will live. I see young women who know the word of God and can quote it; who know the standards of the Church and live by them; who have a sense of worth and a wondrous sensitivity to the beauties of life and nature, music and art; who treasure truth and seek to enlarge their understanding of it; who have determined that worthiness to enter the house of the Lord for a divine endowment and an eternal sealing is the most desirable of all goals. Can anyone doubt that there is something divine within such?

"I see young mothers. I have three daughters and two daughters-in-law who love and honor their husbands, who nurture and treasure and train their children, who teach and direct in the organizations of the Church, who go to the house of the Lord with unselfishness in their hearts, who love life and face its challenges and adversities as well as drink deeply of its enriching experiences and beauties....

"I observe older women, mature from the living of many years. In their hearts is a solid, unshakable residual of faith. In their souls is a great residual of love to be widely spread for the blessing of others. In their minds is an appreciation for goodness and truth and beauty. In their hearts is an understanding for and a love of God our Eternal Father and His Beloved Son, our Redeemer.

"These are among those who rise to the stature of the divine inheritance they carry."

- Gordon B. Hinckley, "Rise to the Stature of the Divine within You," General Conference Women's Meeting October 1989
Click here to read or listen to the full talk

President Hinckley shared these remarks with a General Women's Meeting in the October 1989 conference. He was trying to convey his sense of the role of women in mortality through the different phases of their lives, their divine potential now and eternally, and the opportunities they have to do good.

The challenge to "rise to the stature of the divine within you" is a profound one. It conveys a sense of the faith we have in our divine heritage, as children of God, bearing His nature and potential. It invites us to become more like him as we progress through the stages of life, learning through faith and study, through service and experience. What a profound invitation it is for each of us to ponder!

(Compilation and commentary by David Kenison, Orem, Utah, 2018)

Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf on the influence of women in the lives of youth and children

Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf (born November 6, 1940) served as a Seventy from 1994-2004, when he was called as a member of the Quorum of Twelve.  He served as second counselor in the First Presidency from 2008 to 2018.

"As we look at the history of this earth and at the history of the restored Church of Jesus Christ, it becomes obvious that women hold a special place in our Father’s plan for the eternal happiness and well-being of His children.

"I hope that my dear sisters throughout the world—grandmothers, mothers, aunts, and friends—never underestimate the power of their influence for good, especially in the lives of our precious children and youth!...

"There is a saying that big gates move on small hinges. Sisters, your example in seemingly small things will make a big difference in the lives of our young people. The way you dress and groom yourselves, the way you talk, the way you pray, the way you testify, the way you live every day will make the difference. This includes which TV shows you watch, which music you prefer, and how you use the Internet. If you love to go to the temple, the young people who value your example will also love to go. If you adapt your wardrobe to the temple garment and not the other way around, they will know what you consider important, and they will learn from you.

"You are marvelous sisters and great examples. Our youth are blessed by you, and the Lord loves you for that."

- Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "The Influence of Righeous Women," Ensign, Sept 2009, pp. 2-7
Click here to read the full article

This article, written as a monthly First Presidency Message when President Uchtdorf was serving as a counselor to President Monson, shares doctrine and encouragement about the sacred role of righteous women in God's plan of happiness. President Uchtdorf expressed a vision of the potential for good that they have in so many ways:

The description of the example of righteous women and the influence that small things can have is a powerful reminder. Those "seemingly small things" that include appearance, speech, choices of priorities, and dress truly can "make a big difference in the lives of our young people." How important for all of us, women and men alike, to consider carefully the messages we are sharing!

The rest of the article contains personal stories of President Uchtdorf's family, and additional counsel that is well worth reviewing particularly for women, but also for men as we consider how we esteem and treat the women in our lives.

(Compilation and commentary by David Kenison, Orem, Utah, 2018)

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland on divine help in the challenges of motherhood

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland (born December 3, 1940) served as Church Commissioner of Education from 1976-1980, as the president of BYU from 1980-1989, as a Seventy from 1989-1994, and as a member of the Quorum of Twelve Apostles since 1994.

"When you have come to the Lord in meekness and lowliness of heart and, as one mother said, 'pounded on the doors of heaven to ask for, to plead for, to demand guidance and wisdom and help for this wondrous task,' that door is thrown open to provide you the influence and the help of all eternity. Claim the promises of the Savior of the world. Ask for the healing balm of the Atonement for whatever may be troubling you or your children. Know that in faith things will be made right in spite of you, or more correctly, because of you.

"You can’t possibly do this alone, but you do have help. The Master of Heaven and Earth is there to bless you—He who resolutely goes after the lost sheep, sweeps thoroughly to find the lost coin, waits everlastingly for the return of the prodigal son. Yours is the work of salvation, and therefore you will be magnified, compensated, made more than you are and better than you have ever been as you try to make honest effort, however feeble you may sometimes feel that to be.

"Remember, remember all the days of your motherhood: 'Ye have not come thus far save it were by the word of Christ with unshaken faith in him, relying wholly upon the merits of him who is mighty to save.' (2 Ne. 31:19.)

"Rely on Him. Rely on Him heavily. Rely on Him forever. And 'press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope.' (2 Ne. 31:20.) You are doing God’s work. You are doing it wonderfully well. He is blessing you and He will bless you, even—no, especially—when your days and your nights may be the most challenging. Like the woman who anonymously, meekly, perhaps even with hesitation and some embarrassment, fought her way through the crowd just to touch the hem of the Master’s garment, so Christ will say to the women who worry and wonder and sometimes weep over their responsibility as mothers, 'Daughter, be of good comfort; thy faith hath made thee whole.' (Matt. 9:22.) And it will make your children whole as well."

- Jeffrey R. Holland, "Because She Is a Mother," General Conference April 1997
Click here to read or listen to the full talk

I posted an excerpt from this talk three years ago (Jeffrey R. Holland on praise for mothers), but it is so full of insight and inspiration that I have to share another, and encourage readers to review the complete talk in anticipation of Mother's Day this week.

Part of the power of Elder Holland's address is acknowledging the difficulties and challenges faced by mothers, and the feelings of inadequacy and loneliness that sometimes creep in. He powerfully reassures them of two things: 1) they are doing "wonderfully well" in the task, far better than they sometimes understand; and 2) they have help available from Heaven to bless and sustain. This is a wonderful formula for any of us who struggle with any aspect of our mortality: "Yours is the work of salvation, and therefore you will be magnified, compensated, made more than you are and better than you have ever been as you try to make honest effort, however feeble you may sometimes feel that to be."

Truly, mothers bear some heavy burdens, and where we are in a position to help, we should do all we can to assist in bearing those burdens. But perhaps turning one another to Christ and helping all to know how to draw on His power is the most important thing we can do for each other. There is divine help available for us in powerful ways. There is peace and hope and confidence, through Him. That truth will never change.

(Compilation and commentary by David Kenison, Orem, Utah, 2018)